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My child refuses to read at home support

7-step re-set for reading time

Exhausted by the battle of getting your child to read at home?  Given up and feeling guilty about getting your child to read?

If you have hit a real wall with reading at home try this 7-step approach.  The idea is to totally transform and re-set reading time at home. Of course, if you feel like things are not too bad, you can pick and choose within the stages. But if reading at home is a real problem, I suggest starting at the beginning and taking it slowly… 

Step 1. Tonight, you don’t need to read.  Tonight, you just get to listen to a story.

At which point you start to read (their school book or an appropriate book of their choice). Chat with them about what you are reading.  This is about sharing a book together in a calm and relaxed way – no-one is tense or preparing for the reading battle. If they engage with you and talk about the book (they don’t even need to look at it), congratulate them on a good reading session.  Personally, I write this in a school reading record as ‘shared reading’. You may wish to do this a few times.

Step 2, start reading as before but encourage them to look at the book.  Talk about the pictures with them. If they want to sit, stand or lie, you may wish to do the same.  Or consider bath-time when they’re contained in one space!

Step 3, If there is some speech, the caption to a picture or a fun word (like “stop” or “wow”), point and ask them to read that individual word or group of words.  Make sure it is a word you’d expect them to be able to read.  It is especially good if they can shout it (“help!”) or whisper it (“Ssshh”)! Then you carry on reading and chatting about the book. Congratulate them.

Step 4, start reading, but to ensure they are following the text as you read, ask them to read the word that you’ve got to when you click your fingers (you remain silent for that word).  Eg “Peter loved going to play [click] in the park”.  This can be presented as a fun game.  When will I click?!  To start with, read a bit before you click, then choose an easy word and click. Put your finger under the words as you read.  As they get better, you can increase how often you click, or choose slightly harder words.  I’d probably still read the difficult words myself at this stage.  You want to keep their confidence and enjoyment high.  Congratulate them. 

Step 5, start reading but ask them to read the last sentence on the page.  It is important it is the last one.  This gives them a sense of success and completion.  The first sentence at the top of a page or paragraph can seem a bit daunting.  If they are reluctant, try the last few words instead of the whole sentence. It doesn’t need to be every page either – judge their mood and don’t push it! Congratulate them.

Stage 6, ask them to read the first sentence on the page with you.  You literally read it together, slowly, and you just carry on if they stumble. Don’t go back and discuss or sound out a word.  Congratulate them on reading with you. 

Stage 7, ask them to read a paragraph or a couple of sentences, but then promise you will read the rest.  This can gradually evolve into taking turns to read (sentences, paragraphs or pages).  Congratulate them.

As you get to turn taking in stage 7, you just gradually increase the amount that they do over time.  Or if they seem reluctant again you might give them a choice: how do you want to read?  Do you want to read the first and last sentence on the page?  Do you want to do the click game?  Shall we take it in turns to read a page?  Do you want to read with me?  

Some of these ideas will work better for you than others.  You can also mix them up so that they are gradually reading more and more themselves.  Don’t rush it though.  You are trying to get your child back into enjoying reading at home.  The first step is to sit down and tolerate it!  Then you want it to be a fun time together.  If you rush it, they will back away.   So flex it as you need to.  On a tired, grumpy night, you might need to go back a step or two.

After the first stage, try to ensure they are following as you read, even if they are not reading aloud.

If they get distracted, take a break, but explain you will finish it (eg when they’ve brushed their teeth).  5 minutes + 5 minutes might work for some 7 year olds for example, whereas others will manage longer in one sitting.

Keep talking about what you are reading as you can help with their comprehension this way.

If you feel that they are on the wrong level of book, don’t be afraid to talk to school or check they have brought the correct level of book home. 

If you can have some spare books at home, give them a choice.  It’s always easier to engage with a book we’re interested in.  Libraries are a great option but you can also pick up cheap books from charity shops, fetes and school fairs.  Perhaps you could borrow books from friends? 

And remember, learning to read is a marathon not a race.  Some children learn slowly, some quickly, some seem to go backwards at times!  We all have bad days.  Keep in mind their progress over months not days. Try not to compare with others, only with themselves.  And remember that regular support at home really does help, even if it’s not perfect…

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By RSathome

I'm based in the UK with experience in state and private schools; special needs; and a parent. Keen to share ideas and encourage families supporting literacy at home.